I guess I should not be surprised that Life & Style magazine are once again serving up bottom of the barrel stars in bottom of the barrel stories that are literally six months old now, nor should I be surprised that they’ve photoshopped Cuntina Aguilera into some sort of tropical island resort for honestly no reason at all.
What I was surprised by is that this basic bitch of a magazine continues to write such incredibly uplifting and positive messages to it’s readers as the following.
I’m talking about the “Bullied over her weight, Christina get’s her best body ever – after two babies. Her never-go-hungry diet that’s better than lipo!” part, though going inside Karina Smirnoff’s closet also counts as a violation based on the shoes alone.
It’s a beautiful message to send to your readers. “If people call you a fat bitch, listen to them and lose weight!” Conform! Eat a salad! You’re disgusting! Kill yourself”
Even though Christina Aguilera is just the worst, and let’s be honest, she’s who that chick in Nashville is based upon, I kind of liked her when she had a big booty. It represented some form of rebellion against her label, against her detractors, and against what is expected of her. Rebellion is the one thing that was specifically interesting about Christina in her early career (Stripped, Back to Basics) which is now notably absent and could be part of the reason why her records are not selling.
The fact that she has played into the negative comments on her weight is both her right to as a woman, but is also entirely predictable in the paradigm of her celebrity.
As you will see in the “weight” tag, we’ve only written one weight related article, and that’s about Christina.
In that article I pointed out her hypocrisy regarding her weight, the accusations of her bullying other singers for their own weight, and how her line to the public changes to suit. Aguilera was quoted slamming her label, claiming to be proud of her fuller figure, then months later she appears ultra skinny just in time for a new season of The Voice. What kind of message does that send?
Weight is an issue that Aguilera cannot win. As a female popstar, society will hold her to standards that are unrealistic in any of her forms. But as Christina worked hard to transform her figure, she may not have been noticing that society is changing.
Currently newcomer Meghan Trainor sits atop the Billboard Hot 100 for a fifth week. A pop-star not made entirely of bones and abs, Trainor’s “All About that Bass” is a rebellious anthem for girls of all shapes and sizes to feel proud of who they are, and it’s dominating in a way that the Billboard hasn’t seen for some time. Also in the top 10 is a Nicki Minaj song about her big ass in which she turns some of the remarks directed at women’s bodies against men, and a Taylor Swift song about brushing off critics.
A fuller-figured Christina at last years PCAs
Being defiantly who you are is the new normal for 2014. Of course though, this romantic message does not always gel with the music business reality. Trainor is a beautiful girl who could hardly be defined as “super plus sized”, Swift has a ridiculously lean physique and Minaj has an augmented everything to be an exagerated representation of the male ideal of a female body.
But Aguilera is a rare breed. The established pop star that could have transformed her career and had notable social impact by becoming a role model for the real girl, showing beauty comes in various forms. This would have allowed her to finally rely more on her actual vocal talent as opposed to how many FHM cover’s she can nail in her knickers.
There’s no doubt Christina feels more comfortable in a world of the weight obsessed when she’s thinner, and maybe as a human being she just feels better this way, but that’s the question here – with all her talking about how she’s really a “fat girl”, is this the real her, or have the “bullies” won? Either way, what’s Christina’s quite literal loss is Meghan Trainor’s gain.
LA Deli is a satire/comedy column. We put a humorous spin on reported news, rumors, speculation, assumptions, opinions as well as factual information, the veracity of which cannot be guaranteed.
We cannot provide any warranty on the validity of what is posted.
Content written by Little Banyan Media 2014. Images property of their rightful owners.