The Greatest Photoshop Imaginings of our Time
Photoshop is a tool of great power. It help’s Mariah Carey sell CDS. It Help’s Britney Spears sell concert tickets. It helps Jessica Simpson appear to lose more weight than she really has when she does the ‘After’ posters for weight watchers.
But the real power of photoshop has clearly been announced today in another round of “What famous people would look like if they didn’t have a staff of 400 making them look beautiful” affair which implies that any beauty celebrities have is not natural, and thereby makes us all feel pretty great.
So lets laugh at terrible pictures of fat and old people with celebrity faces stuck onto their bodies! Ha!
1. Chubby Jennifer Aniston
Apparently Jennifer Aniston would be a porker without her health regime. I can kind of see it since when she first joined Friends she actually weighed more than a sack of feathers. Jennifer would also be unable to use a hairbrush due to dehabilitating chubbiness.
2.Rihanna as a Christian Pastor
Apparently not only would Rihanna be fat, but she would also be a lot older and a Christian pastor in the mid-west rather than look anything like other Bajan women. Rihanna’s hair is immaculate though, so that’d be a positive change.
3. Madonna at her real age.
Madonna might say she’s 53, but according to this artist Madonna is 74 and also went to prison where they don’t have Shampoo.
4. Sarah Jessica Parker would be amongst her own kind.
This just isn’t fair.
5. Gwneyth Paltrow would be an Agony Aunt
Instead of writing GOOP apparently Gwneyth would write Aunt GOOP. Instead of giving advice on rare south asian colonics, she’d give advice on what to do if you find your boyfriend using HIS colonic.
5. Beyonce and Jay-Z would be total ghetto trash
Even though Beyonce is actually from a reasonably wealthy background in Houston and Jay-Z grew up in a project in Brooklyn, they still found their way to each others skanky arms where Jay-Z became a hipster nerd and Beyonce got some hair product.
6. Miley Cyrus would be exactly the same.
The only thing that is different is hair styling. This is actually an upgrade.