Tag Archives: The Today Show

MooMi must really be deaf from SoulCycle

Remember that rumour that Moomz went deaf from too much SoulCycle (she lost a lot of weight and then didn’t release any music – and if you know one thing about Mariah Carey it is that she will drop 30lbs for a music video and a music video ALONE) well if this video of Moomi on the Today show is anything to go by, that rumour was true and she’s still as deaf as that adorable deaf pug. Except that adorable deaf pug can now sing better than Mariah Carey. She sounds like she’s channelling the crack voice of Whitney Houston here, which would be an accurate parallel for vocal degradation.  Mariah cares so much about nailing this track (but not really) that she forgets the words at 1.55 and makes up the line “I don’t know the words to my own song and I don’t care.”  and she stops mid-song to direct a cameraman to “get a good angle”. (Side shot of team of 100 bringing in Mariah’s specially designed Kino Flos) Moomz then goes on to start opening her mouth and acting like notes were coming out, but they weren’t (2:38). Turns out those notes were the high notes she can no longer hit that were digitally added by NBC when it went live because Moomz didn’t want a repeat disaster of her last year’s  GMA caterwauling. I don’t know why this delusional butterfly empress keeps going into the studio and hitting “RECORD” on the dolphin register if she knows she can’t hit those notes anymore. Bitch needs to know no-one really likes hearing her sounding like a sea mammal in distress anyway. In addition to being deluded about her voice,  the Mariah Carey that was on that Today Show stage was giving shades of HARPO, WHO DIS WOMAN? at the “I AM. MARIAH. THE...
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Read: Mariah Carey is the QUEEN OF CHRISTMAS

Kelly Clarkson is getting a little hopped up right now , what with her Christmas album selling more copies than Brit Brit’s new cd in it’s sixth week, and so the Butterfly Empress of Christmas herself flew down from her spanx bound castle up in the winter sky on a unicorn to grace Tamron from The Today Show with her heavenly yuletide presence. NBC and a crew of about 40 lighting engineers rocked up to Mimi’s palace to promote….ehrm….I dont know, Mimi – at Christmas?  Mimi talked about how she’s constantly been downplaying her injury to her arm like the humble angel she is. Mariah then went on to talk over Tamron throughout the entire interview and almost fall out of her negligee. Yes, that’s right, Mariah made NBC come to her house, and emerged in full makeup, and her negligee….. The best part of Mimi was that she was in her “special room” which is a room where her awards have been strategically placed for film crews to capture whenever they visit.  When Tamron valiantly tried to give the interview some relevant context by referring to “All I Want For Christmas (Is Mimi’s Annual Royalites)” Mimi, always on point, was quick to note “I have other songs, but whatever, whatever” before interrupting again to draw attention to her negligee. Mariah even had a “re-positioning video” at the ready, where such images as Mariah hugging Babs Streisand, and pan zooms of her toilet were used to allow her to gracefully segue between stations without her bad side ever showing, or NBC getting an eyeful of tit. Alas, not one to disappoint, Mariah then almost immediately ensured one of her tits would be front and center from her robe, and gave a small statuesque pose next to the tree, apologizing demurely for her...
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