Oh Britney, it was all going so well. Night two of Brit Brit’s big return from her summer of Fraps and an unfortunate video has appeared on Instagram of Brit Brit lip-syncing. ‘Britney, lip-syncing?! Quelle Surprise!’ I hear you cry, but this was a particularly embarrassing incident. When it was time to perform Brit’s latest ballad ‘Perfume’ her sound engineer appears to have pushed up the wrong fader resulting in Britney’s ‘vocals’ being barely audible, drowned out by backing vocals from the unmistakable Sia Furler. Someone is going to get a firm turn of Team Britney’s backhand tonight for this mess and Daddy Spears is going to create a “No Cheese Grits For You” list from here on in. Brit Brit probably walked off stage afterwards and was like “Did y’all hear mah voice, oh mah god y’all I sounded AMAZEENG! I didn’t even feel like ah was singing, isn’t that crazay?” It’s one thing to lip sync to your own vocals on a song. It’s quite another to lip sync to your backing vocalist’s. Probably not super wise given that there are already questions over how much singing on your own songs you actually do these days. Le sigh, team Britney is always so close to a slam dunk and then they snatch it back away. Anyway, Brit Brit looked great and lip-synced that shit power hard, but let’s get down to the REAL question of the night, what the hell was on her head?
So Britney Spears is widely considered to be the foremost vocalist of a generation, widely called upon for her acapella abilities and soulful renditions, Spears has developed a far-reaching reputation as the most respected live vocalist of her era. Which is why the world is SHOCKED and APPALLED to learn that not only is Britney Spears not singing live, but in fact she relies heavily of vocal processing to make her voice passable. The internets are losing their shit that Britney has apparently gotten away with being so tone deaf for so many years and now in an ESCALANDO leak she appears to have the musicality of your ten-bottles-in aunt at Christmas on your cousins broke ass plastic Karaoke machine. Thoughts on this are yes, Brit Brit sounds horrible, but William Orbit has jumped to her defence and said that this was a warm up, not the final recording of Britney. When singers are not used to the tracks they are recording, they will trial it out to get a feel for the pitch and tone, which is probably a good thing because “pitch” and “tone” are not things that Brit is registering on this. William said the world should be ashamed for trying to make Brit look bad by leaking these unfinished test vocals. That’s all fine and well and shit, but you know i nailed Alien better than this in the shower this morning (no shame) and I don’t get paid $300,000 a night to do this professionally. I have to add though that something in the water aint quite right about the sample. It sounds like that shit has been autotuned at the start to make Brit sound even worse. And I guess the world can also turn to the various pieces of evidence out there that Britney can sing and...
The practice of big artists beefing up their vocals on tracks with a veritable chorus of backing singers is not a new one. Almost every major recording artist is guilty of this to varying degrees, and one who’s always been a notable adopter of softening her…distinctive vocal style with a symphony of other voices is Brit Brit. After the debacle of her last album’s release cleared – that being intense fan dissatisfaction, questions over authenticity of vocals, outrage at poor autotuning et all – one of the remaining questions swirled around backing singer Myah Marie. Marie has made a name for herself in recent years as a backing vocalist for Britney essentially because she sounds exactly like her. For Britney fans, mentioning Myah Marie’s name is like hitting a giant RAGE button to unleash this.
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