Tag Archives: Jennifer Garner


Jennifer Garner may star in a movie that doesn’t suck

Jennifer Garner looks like she’s maybe signed up for a movie that isn’t going to be either total trash (Arthur) or nobody will go see (Butter). “The Dallas Buyers Club” stars Matthew McConaughey (ugh) as an AIDS patient and is based on a true story. It actually is shaping up pretty nicely with great directing and acting talent attached, and since McConaughey is going through a bit of a career uptick ,and has lost a lot of weight for the role, suggesting he’s after an Oscar for the film.  The movie has been in development for over 10 years and once had Brad Pitt attached to lead. Also now signed on to the movie is Gael Garcia Bernal and in a rare move Jared Leto, who tends to pick carefully due to his music commitments.  Garner has consistently deserved better than what she’s in onscreen, as she’s shown in Alias, 13 Going on 30 and Juno that she has diversity and range. As she remains in a semi-retirement mode due to her mothering duties, so for her to pick poorly in her few projects of the year seems to be bringing her acting career closer to oblivion. Still, with her Vandalia films, Garner is quietly producing projects both for herself and for TV . Here’s for hoping the Dallas Buyers club will both re-inject her career with much needed success and also get her the acting props she deserves.
Read More »

Garfleck celebrate 7 years on Tommy’s divorce day

In a cruel twist of contractual fate, Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck celebrated 7 years together on the very same day that Tommy Girl announced that his fembot had malfunctioned and filed for divorce. The 7 year mark puts Ben and Jen together for over 3 times as long as “Bennifer”. Jennifer has stood by Ben as blind items flew about him boning younger actresses, playing the field for both teams and gambling again. This lady is a younger actress. Of course blind items are ALWAYS 100% TRUE so Jen basically is a saint. The weird thing about Garfleck is apart from ‘BEING ADORABLE’ no one really knows anything about their relationship. There have been plenty of rumours, and Jennifer Garner is usually cast as the person trying frantically to keep their failing marriage together for the sake of her children, with Ben too afraid to leave incase Hollywood turns on him.  I for one, choose to believe that they are the perfect couple and all the rumours are grossly unfair and untrue. Because if i can’t do it for one fucking couple in Hollywood, then who CAN i do it for? Congratulations Ben and Jen! How you guys are both still A-listers other than being a union, I am not quite sure, but all i know is that im super happy about it anyway.
Read More »

Jennifer Garner’s awful career choices continue.

Jennifer Garner’s latest movie is called “The Odd Life of Timothy Green” but Disney should think of re-titling it “We’ll settle for 13 Million Total Box Office. Shouldn’t this be a TV Movie?”. See the trailer if you don’t believe me. Oh Jen, How did we get here? Rarely do women in Hollywood pull off the incredible feat of making both men and women actually like them. Guys find it acceptable to like her because Jennifer Garner is hot and girls put away their claws because they think shes cute and funny, and that’s because she is! She really really is. So if she’s one of like, six actresses who men and women alike think is kind of awesome, so why is it that everyone still remembers Jennifer Garner for a TV role she ended over 7 years ago? What the hell, Jennifer? You’ve won real proper awards woman! You are a talented actress! What is going on!? The only roles people tend to remember Jennifer Garner in off the big screen is Daredevil (2003) and the genuine cult hit 13 Going on 30 (2004) which originally cast major buzz about Garner as a leading lady due to her surprisingly strong comedic ability. But those movies were years ago, Garner’s last acclaimed role was in a very supporting capacity in the hipstertastic Juno (2007) and i guess in some Neutrogena commercials which make me want to buy whatever the hell it is shes selling Fortunately for Garner, she always seems to emerge from flops smelling like roses. Unfortunately for us, that means we continuously see a talented actress wasted in films with flimsy scripting offering her little to do. On paper, the movies should have been hits, so we wonder what the thought process was behind choosing to star in them….. Elektra On Paper: ”After establishing...
Read More »

Five Reasons why Revenge is the best show on tv.

Sorry, Dallas, i know you’re back and all, but every dog has it’s day, and  Revenge on ABC has gone down as one of the sleeper hits of the season – posting some of the best numbers for a new show launch on ABC since LOST more or less pissed everyone off with a shitshow of an ending a few years ago. But despite the damage LOST did to the serial drama genre, the public has a short memory and that’s why the second season pickup of Revenge is probably the best thing to happen to television since 30 Rock.  So if you haven’t already caught “Revenge”, then here’s five reasons why your Nielson points should be in the shows favour come September when its second season launches. 1. Emily VanCamp is like, a really good actress. Like Homeland for Clare Danes, Revenge has reinvented Emily VanCamp as an actress rather than a pretty role-filler. Portraying the complex double-character of Emily Thorne with restraint and calculated ease, she has the incredible ability to switch between good and downright evil with just a twist of her mouth and more importantly without falling into the trap so many actresses do when presented with devious women – melodrama. VanCamp’s careful portrayal of Emily also does the unthinkable and sells a character who’s motives are entirely dangerous to the audience as a sympathetic one. Attention will no doubt be paid to the more deliciously evil and over-the-top character of Victoria Grayson, but I’d contest VanCamp out-acts Madeline Stowe at every juncture by showing restraint where Stowe goes for the thrill. Watching VanCamp in this show is like seeing an early Jennifer Garner appearing onscreen, she brings a level of presence and command to her scenes that few actresses of her age can. And speaking of Garner, if...
Read More »

Jennifer Garner is perpetually pregnant.

It’s pretty fucking lucky that ALIAS ended when it did, because Jennifer Garner appeared to have been holding up four lifetimes of BEBE-MAKING to unleash an army  attractive, strong-jawed offspring with Ben Affleck. No one wants to see Sydney Bristow in that lacy bra and panties with a giant baby bump. But here it is anyway. Mariah Carey speed-dialing my number for mad good photoshop skills. No surprise then that the MONTHSSSSS (gossip rag writers are seriously fucking boring people) of speculation about Jennifer Garner being knocked up again has come to an end after Jen announced to People that Yes! She is going to be fat for the better part of yet another year!  I personally love my Jennifer Garner to look like a whale, so I’m totally okay with this. In fact, Jennifer Garner could be clinically obese and i’d still walk away from a sausage stand for her.  Jen said the usual shit about how ‘thrilled’ she was to have another bebe and how her vagina is basically a rag flapping around in the wind now. Okay she didn’t say the last part, but she should have. Jennifer Garner will be a Duggar soon and her vagina is looking for a band aid and some sutures to DIY itself back to health. In less happy news, this all appears to confirm a number of blind items about Jen and Ben which infer that he wants to leave her, and has cheated on her numerous times; something that she’s become fed up about and is ready to end the marriage over.
Read More »
Scroll To Top