Quelle Surprise: Goopy Paltrow is insufferable.

Quelle Surprise: Goopy Paltrow is insufferable.

Because the grass is still green, the sky is still blue, and Avril Lavigne is still mentally 17- it should come as no surprise that Gwyneth Paltrow is still about as much fun as sticking a pin through your peehole.

Highly reputable (not really) source RadarOnline reports that Goopy is just bein’ Goopy about her divorce, and by that I mean she’s being a smug bitch to any and every person that will listen.

“’Conscious uncoupling’ has become a joke among Gwyneth’s friend,” a source close to the 41-year-old Country Strong star told Radar.

“All she’s doing is bragging about how peaceful her divorce is and how she and Chris planned it so perfectly that it is hardly disrupting their lives….She has become insufferable saying how happy she is with the way everything is evolving, It’s so ridiculous to listen to her talk as if nothing bad is going on at all for her.  But Gwyneth has always had a protected privileged life and this is no different.”

I mean Radar play a pretty good game of making up sources to tell the world what is clearly happening anyway.

You just know Goopy is inviting her friends over to have yoga & colon cleanse parties to nourish their inner assholes, and she’s talking about how the divorce has transformed her chakra and her poppyseed and lemon chicken is 90% better now because she’s having the best divorce of all time.

Apparently in addition to Goopy harping ahhhn and ahhnnn about how wonderful her divorce is and how no one else has ever had a divorce so civil, she’s also cosying up in some white linen pajamas that she bought with money she nicked out of GOOP.com

According to Radar, some assholes are actually falling for that GOOP shit as it made $1.9 Million in 2012, and cost barely anything to run.

But Goopy and her Goop CEO Sebastian Bishop paid themselves nearly $600,000 as well as ‘interest free loans to directors’ I assume which they spent on expensive candles and Yak cotton throws. In all, once everything is paid, GOOP is basically losing money and could default on loans that were due, as the CEO has now left the company – which kind of makes you wonder why the fuck GOOP needs a lone since its founder is worth $60 Million.

I really don’t know what the world will do without advice on how to have baths that would make anyone with pepper allergies die in a quick minute.

Tags :
Previous post link
Next post link

Leave a Reply

Scroll To Top