Simon Cowell has admitted that he fired Nicole Scherzinger from this year’s X-Factor UK because he was pretty sure that there’d be a clash of the Ego titans between Nicole and Cheryl Cole.
Speaking to the apex of modern journalism known as The Sun, Simon said that he “Didn’t think the two of them would work well together.”
TRANSLATION: “I had a vision of the future in which Nicole was having a raging meltdown in her dressing room because Cheryl was wearing yellow and ONLY SHE WANTED TO WEAR YELLOW THIS WEEK and so I thought”Fuck this shit” and handed Nicole her pinkslip and put her on the 84 bus so she could catch her connecting flight back to irrelevance.”
Simon had previously admitted that Cheryl only returned on the basis that she would have a say on who would be on the panel. Since Cheryl has been doing a great deal of sweet fuck all lately, it’s pretty impressive that she leveraged this kind of power – all of X-Factors 15 remaining viewers will be really excited to learn which basic bitch will be joining Cheryl on the panel.
Both Cheryl and Nicole are known for their sub-par musical releases and their shampoo adverts, so maybe ITV were just stressed out that they’d spend every episode moaning orgasmically and telling girls that they’re werth it tew.
All i can say is that what this season of X-Factor really needs to save it’s ailing ass is DRUNK PAULA!
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