House arrest is like, really difficult you guys!
Since the incredibly trying and difficult proccess known as House Arrest befell Lindsay Lohan it was only a matter of time until some shit went down. It’s not a day in the life of Lindsay Lohan unless she is taking the law out behind the bike shed and violating it repeatedly.
Lindsay had the police round when her house arrest bracelet went off. The po-po showed up and found Lindsay calling her neighbour a murderer. She went on to say she had just watched “An awesome old movie from a really talented director” called Disturbia.
Okay this is only half true. Lilo’s anklet did go off, the police did pop round her gaffe and they found her, wait for it, READING SCRIPTS. I’m pretty sure by “scripts” they mean “big booklets of blank paper” because fuck knows that the only scripts Lindsay Lohan will be getting this decade will be the script for her mothers next hourly press release.
House Arrest sounds like a fucking dream come true to me. Daytime television? CHECK. Friends who will bring you an infinite supply of junk food? CHECK. Masturbation Hours by the Boatload? CHECK. If any other basic bitch had shoplifted bedazzled jewels WHILST ON PROBATION they would be crying in a prison shower by now. But then again, they don’t have the difficult life of Lindsay Lohan.