Herpes always was a good selling point for fragrances
Everyone knows the best way to launch a fragrance these days is with herpes. I mean, you could make a really easy joke about herpes when you discuss ”Be Reem” and “Dazzle”, the official fragrances of The Only Way Is Essex, but Kirk from the show was wise about this. Last night he was stroking his monacle in his armchair thinking
“Those dastardly bastards on the internet, they will mock us for our fragrances, and not give the rich, woody fragrance with citrus undertones and a touch of vanilla a chance! I can’t have that. I can just hear them making jokes about how our beautiful fragrances will give them venereal diseases! I shan’t hear of it! I shall get one up on them! Ha! Then THEY will look stupid. Not our elegant and timeless fragrances!”
Well Played, Kirk Norcross, this round is yours, but the in next round i’ll bring Zovirax and some Paris Hilton Perfume, then you’ll know true elegance.
I mean I could go on to talk about the fact that they launched this fragrance at The Fragrance Shop in Lakeside Shopping Centre, widely known to be the premiere venue for major fragrance launches amongst both the pikey and prostitute circles, or I could talk about Sam and her interestingly placed dress-window, which involves us looking into the window, where her tittaes are enjoyed some mulled wine by an open fire. Sam’s tittaes are wondering what the odd smell is outside, but they don’t care, because the central heating is on and they’ve just put on The Holiday on DVD.