Christina Aguilera ft her train ass.

Christina Aguilera has always been a controversial figure who’s sparked much debate, such as “Will Christina Aguilera always be the Gretchen Wieners?” and “Is Christina Aguilera Snooki with light makeup on?” or “Is it really fair that Papa Johns is throwing in this free Christina Aguilera CD, can’t I just get a diet coke?” but debate took a new turn after this weekends American Music Awards, AND THAT TURN WAS BIG.

In a night that would otherwise have been simply yet another awards show in which the presence of Christina Aguilera was undetectable in everywhere but the men’s bathroom, Christina brought a companion in her new train-sized ass along to the party to play and instantly hit headlines worldwide. That crafty ass!

It’s a pretty big coup for Xtina this year, because she’s not selling CDs any more, so giving birth to the most gloriously epic celebrity ass of all time must be some consolation to Xtina.

I’m sure Xtina will harp on about positive body image and how she’s not afraid to be the woman she really is etc etc, but let’s not forget this is the same troll who was in chaps shaking her exposed ass whilst looking like two twiglets having a fight with a rasta wig to sell CDs a few years ago and making girls across the world feel like heffers in the process. 

I guarantee you BansheeTina will be 6stone 2lbs by next Christmas and she’ll talk to People about how she “just felt so unhealthy” and “feels so much cleaner now since her trainer started measuring her meals”. Next!

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