Update: The Does Britney Look Okay? Tour: Rhode Island
Continuing from our previous feature, we join Britney Spears near a KFC in your area in her latest venture on the X-Factor auditions tour, or to Britney known as “Y’ALL WHY DO I HAVE TO WEAR A DRESS? I THINK SHORT SHORTS LOOK JUST FINE. ALSO WHEN CAN I EAT HAM CHOPS AGAIN? THIS ISN’T FUNNY YOU GUYS. IM LIKE, REALLY HUNGRY.”
Today we find Britney hitting Rhode Island with baited breath. Will her hair extensions fall off? Will she fall out of her car? Will she look like a hot mess?
Well, anyone who can explain to me how this woman can be the same as this woman then please feel free to, because I have a theory, and that theory is that Britney Spears is a witch.
She’s smiling again, like a human being! She’s you know, talking to people, touching her fans, like physically actually touching them. Who needs to see Britney exerting literally 0 effort on a stage when we can see her use that energy to string sentences together each week on TV? Every time Brit Brit turns up to an X-Factor audition a town thinks that the Beatles are all alive together and doing reunion gigs, because this is the carnage that occurs. If you value your ear drums, be warned.
My favourite moment in the above catastrophe is when some girl screams “MY LIFE IS OVER, I DIDN’T SEE A THING!”
The look is great and the bandage dress is extremely flattering on Britney and her big boobs, though poor Demi Lovato didn’t hit it quite out of the park with her FAYSHUN choice