Bob Geldof is pissed off at Adele, and she doesn’t care.
Bob Geldof is basically the self-styled Ghandi of music and as such he likes to round up famous people sometimes and shame them into a vanity project in which celebrities test the level of their public’s adoration by standing together in a room and singing a really old shit song urging you to give money to poor and sick people. After this they hop back into their jets, boats and private cars to their next pool party to lie in a bed of blood diamonds and snort coke off the asses of sex-traffic workers from the shittiest parts of Eastern europe.
Bob argues Band Aid is all about the spirit of giving, but everyone else argues that those rich ass hos who sing that mess of a song should be paying from their pockets instead of forcing us to.
One person who might have felt that way is Adele. Adele has basically quit music right now to raise her family, but Bob Geldof and Midge Ure were frothing at the cooch to get Adele on the track because Adele can sell more CDs with a fanny fart than the entirity of One Direction combined. When they called up Adele a hundred million times she was for none of it. Not only did Adele not answer those hos, she’s not even answering her manager right now.
Bob Geldof called out Adele for being the Ursula of land and said
Adele is doing nothing, she’s not answering the phone… she’s not writing. She’s not recording. She doesn’t want to be bothered by anyone. She won’t pick up the phone to her manager. She’s bringing up a family, you know.”
How dare Bob Geldof call the Queen of CD Sales a lazy bitch! Every second that Adele is alive she’s verryyyy very slowly squeezing a new CD out of her heehaw and that takes time, effort and energy! Adele has a follow up to “19” and “21” she’s working on called “84, and at this rate probably 90 to be honest” and Bob should respect that birthing the greatest work of art of our time is a full on fucking job.
Of course, Adele’s people did not take kindly to being publicly berated for the whole affair. Her representative peons said that Adele had never ever confirmed this shit and Bob Geldof is a twat for putting her name on the billing just to generate hype and pressure her into doing it, in the same way he did with Foals.
“Bob and the organisers spoke directly with [Adele’s] management but at no point was she confirmed.”
The peon went on to say that Adele did what all those other famous hos should really be doing and put her hand in her own pocket filled with millions of pound bills and gave that money directly to a charity helping out in Africa to fight Ebola. Maybe Adele felt a bit ICK NAST at the whole idea of gaining publicity off the back of a good cause, or maybe she just realized she didn’t want to be associated with one of the worst songs of all time that keeps getting trotted out like a bad case of crabs every few years.
Adele = 1.
Room full of fame seeking hos = nill.